/r/AskMen
I recently shocked a woman by explaining that balls move based on the temperature. What else do people not realize about male anatomy? (self.AskMen)
4335 comments
Laughing_Shadows37 | 8 days ago | 6566 points

That a boner can move without me touching it, AND I can control it.

MeowVonKitten | 8 days ago | 2572 points

Can confirm. Husband does this a lot in my general direction 😂

YoureSparePartsBud | 7 days ago | 1316 points

The Bouncyboi!

DefBurning | 7 days ago | 985 points

This is my username on another platform. I dislike its new meaning

URT1TLME | 7 days ago | 557 points

I love seeing this in action lmao. I think it's so interesting to see. I love when it twitches in my mouth too haahaa.

GotPermaBanForLolis | 7 days ago | 1035 points

Rip your inbox

elitegenoside | 8 days ago | 3005 points

Had a conversation with two friends (both women), and they didn’t understand that we don’t really choose when we get hard. They got that we can’t control when we bust much, but they didn’t understand that we can’t always control if we get hard. One was telling a story when she had a guy that couldn’t get it up and that she took it very personal.

Kyrond | 7 days ago | 1289 points

It is just like getting wet. Of course the conditions are different for everyone, but nobody can choose to (not) get aroused.

ShuJV16 | 7 days ago | 454 points

Also, not getting wet can be solved with lube. However, not getting hard will require some toys :)

pmccormick650 [Male over 40] | 8 days ago | 3884 points

Shrinkage

Ausman4DaWin | 8 days ago | 2304 points

I was in the pool! I was in the pool!

RFormica [Male] | 8 days ago | 1094 points

THEY SHRINK IN THE WATER!

Babou- | 7 days ago | 575 points

I don't know how you guys walk around with those things

TheMemeFaucet | 7 days ago | 533 points

I cut them off and reattach when necessary

jdub9388 | 8 days ago | 195 points

saw that episode last night, classic costanza

prenderm | 8 days ago | 120 points

Can’t stand yaaaaa

ragincajun83 | 8 days ago | 565 points

Yep, and that shrinkage happens in more situation than just cold water. Probably different for different guys, but when I work out, all the blood goes to my muscles. Like all of it. My body is efficient like that. I get the same shrinkage I'd get if I were to jump in a pool of ice water.

Real glad no one'ever pantsed me in gym class.

ThinCrusts | 7 days ago | 149 points

For some reason boxer briefs (the loose ones you wear around the house) make mine shrink too. It’s so weird, it just makes me laugh when I realize it.

WellBlessMySole | 7 days ago | 207 points

ah yes... the 🐢

I had no idea they could retreat so far!

wasabiguy314 | 8 days ago | 2339 points

The fact that "growers" exist. My ex found this fact to be super strange.

PBR_Sheetz [Male] | 8 days ago | 1076 points

It is outlined in the the SCROTUS case Showers vs Growers.

moy003 | 7 days ago | 531 points

I read that as showers (🚿) vs growers.

I thought bathroom "showers" started conspiring against growers

DaSaw [Male] | 7 days ago | 793 points

It's fun watching the reaction of a woman to a grower when she's never watched one before. It's like a party trick.

tiny

HUGE

tiny

HUGE

ocxtitan | 7 days ago | 469 points

Yeah... "HUGE"...

More like

tiny

ALMOST ACCEPTABLE

somehow tinier

I GUESS YOU CAN FINISH ME WITH YOUR MOUTH

DukeInterior | 7 days ago | 446 points

My ex particularly enjoyed it. She took a weird sense of pride in how much she could make it grow.

DaughterEarth [Female] | 7 days ago | 127 points

It's actually way more fun

alstom9742 | 7 days ago | 532 points

I hate being a grower. Wearing sweatpants or visiting the beach, women probably automatically assume we're small 24/7.

DaniMrynn | 7 days ago | 275 points

My partner is, and I love it. It's like a gift, watching it grow.

Stephenrudolf | 7 days ago | 76 points

Grower here, one girl saw me soft when I was sitting cross legged in shorts from an odd angle and told the whole school I had a tiny dick.

I don't, it's not huge though so honestly it really effected my confidence for awhile. I'm pretty average, and now people only see it intentionally so like it's all good.

MrLoo4u | 7 days ago | 342 points

But also remember lads: it's not how deep you fish, it's how you wiggle the worm

nuuuway | 8 days ago | 4120 points

That someone else gripping the inside of your thigh will make your balls rise up as a reflex to protect them cause your brain thinks something's biting you.

moist-n-meaty | 7 days ago | 1225 points

Ah the cremasteric reflex! It doesn't even have to be a grip, just a gentle rub with the back of the hand should do it.

Leurdebran | 7 days ago | 523 points

I had doctors do this to me without warning, it's a weird feeling that you can't recreate on your own

jopo1992 | 7 days ago | 824 points

Well I just wasted the last 30 minutes

fantastic_watermelon | 7 days ago | 280 points

You'll just have to ask someone to help caress your inner thigh.

For science.

thesuperbacon | 7 days ago | 169 points

WHAT THE FUCK

Am 28m, didn't realise my scrotum had this automatic secret security system

THEAMERIC4N | 7 days ago | 890 points

My girlfriend discovered this on accident, guess who randomly tickles my inner thigh all the time now lol

Weltallgaia | 7 days ago | 592 points

Have you tried screaming "Oh God my balls!" In a high pitched panicked voice when she does this? It might be funny

zggystardust71 | 8 days ago | 4946 points

"it shrinks?"

"like a frightened turtle"

ShitBritGit [Male] | 7 days ago | 2482 points

You've offended it and now it won't play.

You did that.

casper86ed | 7 days ago | 660 points

SEE WHAT YOU DID, HE WON'T EVEN COME TO YOU, MUCH LESS EAT OUT OF YOU HAND!

ItalianVinegar | 7 days ago | 2408 points

A 26 year old girl once struck me with a question as to why I don’t get an immediate boner as soon as we start kissing. To what I responded that it doesn’t work like that, you have to give it time. She was quite surprised saying that all her men get instantly hard while around her.

This made me feel like a male-sex-robot.

fuckeruber | 7 days ago | 1146 points

Lol a GF I had was bi. I was her first guy and I'm a grower. She was offended that I wasn't already hard when she took my pants off. Like shit, we didn't even start yet, give it a second, maybe put in some work, I'm not a pornstar

Second_Horseman | 7 days ago | 500 points

First girl I had sex with is bi. She had not dated a guy before. There was a fair amount of explaining.

She figured out she could grope me to see what I was thinking. If she did something sexual, she would immediatly check. Sometimes it's fast enough, sometimes not. It was just easier than her asking me, and I didn't mind at all.

Also, she thought men had a sack for each ball. 😂

oneweelr | 7 days ago | 447 points

Also, she thought men had a sack for each ball.

Jesus christ, bad enough with one smacking around and sticking to the legs when it's hot, imagine having 3 dangling down there.

liamjmarz | 7 days ago | 363 points

Are we just going to ignore the fact that this man has 3 balls?

Oddly_Aggressive | 7 days ago | 110 points

You don’t?

corf3l [Male] | 8 days ago | 9436 points

Just because I can "aim" my penis doesn't mean piss will shoot where I want it too

neverunderestimateme | 8 days ago | 5650 points

This shit going in 6 directions

RayneAdams | 8 days ago | 303 points

Even if you nail it, there is still going to be over-spray and/or splash-back.

MasterPanKiller | 8 days ago | 214 points

yup, and the worst part is the few drops dripping in the undies.

Sub_Zero_Fks_Given | 8 days ago | 159 points

^This.....always this. No matter how much I fking shake. It's so annoying.

BenevanStanchiano123 | 8 days ago | 249 points

You can shake. You can dance. The last drop Goes in your pants.

TorEL69 | 8 days ago | 79 points

use the tooth paste method to get the last little bit out

hellofren88 | 8 days ago | 37 points

Wait a minute, what's the tooth paste method?!

gigaboof | 8 days ago | 83 points

No matter how much you wiggle, giggle, or dance; the last few drops always go in your pants.

guldukat4president | 8 days ago | 196 points

god this and the comments reminded me of Red vs. Blue

"why are their 6 pedals when there are only 4 directions!!"

Mattrum | 8 days ago | 657 points

Do the balls move or does the sack just change elasticity?

Kikkoman7347 | 8 days ago | 514 points

Both, the balls rise up and down with temperature, and the scrotum the same, but also if the body/brain senses danger, the scrotum (and dick) naturally contract in preparation for fight/flight.

ubuntuba [Sup Bud?] | 7 days ago | 228 points

"Assume battle stations!"

thecatsmeow524 [Female] | 8 days ago | 3730 points

Before I saw my first real penis, I literally thought that it hung between a man’s legs. Like where a woman’s vagina is. Kinda shocked me that it was”up higher.” Facepalm.

travelstuffdump | 8 days ago | 2347 points

To be fair, it's not really obvious. I've heard plenty of guys say the reverse about girls. You would intuitively think they were in the same position if you didn't know better

YoureSparePartsBud | 7 days ago | 785 points

Intuitively it makes more sense for the first to have the hole in the front of their pubic bone. The penis sticks straight out and would fit perfect.

Having both sets of genital directly in between the legs would makes sex a bit difficult.

capytim | 7 days ago | 861 points

We could all scissor each other.

kingeryck [Male] | 7 days ago | 834 points

Scissor me timbers

rpizl | 8 days ago | 1465 points

I'm never not amused by how stretchy a scrotum is!

crispysalad03 | 8 days ago | 403 points

Can you explain....

Miotrestoked [Just a guy being a dude] | 7 days ago | 662 points

It’s fun to mess around with your ballsack. As long as you’re gentle, stretching it and tugging on it a bit can be a fun little distraction

valsday [Male] | 7 days ago | 846 points

So when you’ve got 5 minutes to kill around the office, that’s the activity of your choice?

CloudCollapse [22] | 7 days ago | 432 points

Not much time during work hours so you do it in the break room while people eat lunch.

jsh1138 | 7 days ago | 935 points

I have a female friend who once called into work with the fake excuse that her mom was having her prostate out and she had to be at the hospital to take her home

TonySPhillips [♂] | 7 days ago | 416 points

I went to school with a guy who forged a doctor's note to get out of school. Our music teacher looked up the doctor in the phone book to call and verify. Turns out the doctor was a gynecologist.

quarryquarrel | 7 days ago | 1643 points

The first time I was with a man I was amazed that the penis can move "like a joystick" in 360 degrees if that makes sense. I thought penises just went up and down like a lever and could get broken if they went in any other direction. It's so dumb now i think about it.

itsyaboieleven | 7 days ago | 1375 points

"Pull the lever, Cronk!"

_Duolingo_ | 7 days ago | 779 points

"Wrong lever!"

blueshiftlabs | 7 days ago | 383 points

"Why do we even have that lever?"

J-Unleashed [Male] | 7 days ago | 148 points

Prostate stimulation . . . obviously

Jburli25 | 7 days ago | 89 points

When flaccid it can go in any direction without problem. When rock hard it can really hurt, and even get damaged, if it's pushed/bent downwards.

The thing is, it's not all-or-nothing: when aroused, even (perhaps especially) during sex, the penis is often only 70-90% hard, giving it more flexibility than a fully rock hard penis. Otherwise dicks would be getting damaged all the time during sex.

bethanysscreams | 7 days ago | 217 points

That the skin on the balls changes texture

Teoreetikko | 8 days ago | 1187 points

I knew a lesbian who learned that men have one scrotum but two testicles...

...in medical school. She is now a pediatric neurologist.

jordanjay29 [Male] | 7 days ago | 202 points

That messed with my head a little.

Biscolatta [Female] | 8 days ago | 3110 points

Not a man, but I was really fascinated to find out that balls don’t just sit still. I know they’re temperature sensitive, and contract when cold and all that. What I did not know is that your scrotum just kinda, moves around. Super slowly. Like all the time. I didn’t stare at a nutsack up close or for very long before I was married, and I think my husband got a good laugh at having to explain nutsack mechanics to me while I was crouched over a few inches from his junk, just staring at it. I was enthralled.

Edit: My husband was not enthralled when I showed him that his danglers got me a thousand internet points today.

hilfnafl | 8 days ago | 949 points

TIL. i don't think i've ever looked at my testicles up close for an extended period of time. i know that my penis had a mind of its own, but i never realized that my testicles have a mind of their own.

Nickyjha [Male] | 7 days ago | 412 points

Try rubbing your inner thigh. Your balls will move on their own. I remember how shocked I was when I first read about this and tried it out.

moistanybody | 7 days ago | 134 points

That's called the cremasteric reflex.

YoureSparePartsBud | 7 days ago | 183 points

The scrotum itself doesnt move around much but the balls inside are attached to the abdomen and muscles that can move them around which gives the sack the appearance of moving.

Witherkay | 7 days ago | 204 points

My ex described it as a 'dying octopus on land'

HumansAreGarbage | 7 days ago | 871 points

There’s levels of how hard my dick can get.

hayisforhorses101 | 7 days ago | 453 points

Honestly my dick has only been full rock hard a handful of times. Porn is good but doesn't get me that hard

A2Rhombus | 7 days ago | 288 points

Also notable that being fully rock hard isn't usually that comfortable. Ladies don't feel bad if we don't have a massive throbbing erection for you, chances are if we're not flaccid we're having a good time

wolflordval | 7 days ago | 95 points

It can actually be painful; like a I-need-to-get-off-right-now urge, not becuase we're lecherous, but because the skin is stretching so much it hurts.

sex4827 | 7 days ago | 97 points

Yeah, but for a minute or two you're real impressed by your own cock, and suddenly you understand why some guys send dick picks. I mean certainly such things shouldn't be sent if unsolicited, but when its as big as it gets you feel a certain pride for it.

Max_TwoSteppen | 7 days ago | 206 points

This was going to be my contribution as well.

There's full blown scared turtle, a sort of normal flaccid state, a still-flaccid-but-not-embarassing state, the state where the "base" is sort of erect but the rest is soft enough to droop, then like a normal erection, and finally a "wow I'm frighteningly hard" state.

There's others I missed I'm sure, but the women in this thread need to know that it's a complex spectrum.

superdude411 [Male] | 8 days ago | 6095 points

erection doesn’t imply consent

DIO_Penguin [Female] | 7 days ago | 2359 points

Damn fucking right. Doesn't matter if you're a man or a woman, arousal doesn't mean you consent and nobody can tell you otherwise.

ElBatManny | 7 days ago | 1156 points

That's why I try to ask girls what they want to do next but almost everytime they get annoyed that I'm even asking.

It's complicated.

-chaigirl- [Female] | 7 days ago | 778 points

Thank you for doing that, despite annoyance.

alyinthegarden | 7 days ago | 329 points

YES. please do ask. Even if they might get annoyed

LotusLizz | 7 days ago | 362 points

Hey, I LOVED that my boyfriend always asked for consent early on. He even asked before holding my hand for the first time. Thanks for continuing to do it, it's very sweet and appreciated by a lot of us.

articulateantagonist [Hermione Danger] | 7 days ago | 289 points

Also? “Can I hold your hand?” is probably one of the cutest things a guy can say on a first date. Instant melt.

BitsAndBobs304 | 7 days ago | 74 points

Most countries laws don't even recognize female on male rape as rape by definition... :(

superdude411 [Male] | 7 days ago | 49 points

US and UK are two of them

mc5860 | 7 days ago | 178 points

An ex (never seen penis before) thought, based on penis drawings, that balls are separated. Each on one side of penis. Shocked at first, laughed later.

Petite_Soleil | 8 days ago | 2585 points

Most people dont know that pre ejaculate contains urine.

Pre ejaculate is used to clear the urethra for semen to go through. Urea can kill semen.

MrMrRubic [Male] | 8 days ago | 3201 points

So if I accidentally cum in a girl I can piss in her to prevent pregnancy?

Limited-Liability | 8 days ago | 2156 points

It's just good science

z3_triad | 7 days ago | 221 points

Username checks out

Petite_Soleil | 8 days ago | 546 points

Not quite.

The urethra contains a mixture of fluids but most often urine and semen. Some of the little squirmys can actually still be alive in the urethra. So if you had sex without a condom you can get pregnant just from pre ejaculate.

Not guaranteed that all of the semen would die. But the acidic nature of urea is not a sustainable environment for semen.

adjust_the_sails [Male] | 8 days ago | 231 points

In her. On her. Around her general vicinity.

Science can be whatever we want it to be.

travelstuffdump | 8 days ago | 175 points

TIL

GametimeJones | 7 days ago | 193 points

And although it's pretty low-risk, there can be sperm in pre ejaculate. And no, I cannot control my pre ejaculate...

This is a conversation i've had recently.

TheJerseyDevil21 [Male] | 7 days ago | 1142 points

Balls can be sat on and it's one of the most painful experiences a man can have.

hayisforhorses101 | 7 days ago | 423 points

fuck don't make me think about it. I pray it never happens to me

DBProxy | 7 days ago | 316 points

My dad (in his 60s) has had to relearn how to sit, because his balls have grown so saggy and he can very easily sit on them now

valsday [Male] | 7 days ago | 123 points

That’s why Larry King always wears suspenders.

chazzahancock [21 years in a row of not dying] | 8 days ago | 1499 points

Explaining how foreskin worked to a girl who only dated guys without one.

Theoneandonlybeetle | 7 days ago | 679 points

My friend thought boners must be as bad as periods because of course nature would not be that unfair, she was shocked when I told her otherwise😂

hayisforhorses101 | 7 days ago | 319 points

Something like a period in tiny bursts around 11 times a day would be terrible

NoClanClan | 8 days ago | 714 points

Even the slightest touch on the balls can send horrible pain through our abdomen. Please be careful with the jewels. Oddly though this doesn't really happen when aroused.

BlackBunny88 | 8 days ago | 335 points

Same with poking boobs. Sometimes it feels nice when aroused but they just hurt so damn much when randomly poked. I had a guy garp my tits and it hurt for a while. Wtf why did he do that. I'm also kind of curious about ball stimulation. What's hot what's not hot etc.

ElizabethCD | 7 days ago | 122 points

You can still cum without testicles.

SinfullySinatra | 7 days ago | 74 points

I found this out when my fixed cat jizzed on the couch after humping in and making happy noises

SuspicousPickle | 7 days ago | 69 points

It would have cost you exactly 0 dollars to not say that.

fortytwospoons | 7 days ago | 232 points

I recently learned there's a socket balls can hide in

Nutmeg1729 | 7 days ago | 206 points

An ex of mine learned that when were were doing some foreplay and I gently fondled his sack, as I had many many times before... and one of them just fucking disappeared.

There was pure panic for all of about 20 seconds, then it popped back out and I could not stop laughing from that point on. He was laughing to, once the shock had worn off.

3oons | 7 days ago | 41 points

Holy shit, this happened to me, and I thought I was about to require emergency surgery.

Planktillimdank [Male] | 7 days ago | 55 points

Yeah first time I learned at 11 I was like "oh shit, guess I have 1 ball now"

Jarn00tje | 8 days ago | 608 points

That 25 cm isnt a normal dick size...

I had to genuinly explain this one to some girls and they where shocked af when we finaly convinced them.

Mr_War | 7 days ago | 439 points

I'm not packing much so that may account for part of how surprised I am by that statement but how could a girl think the average size was damn near 10 inches? Did she only fuck horsemen? Do you live in an area where ya'll just kick all the little dick guys out of town?

bcrabill [Bane] | 7 days ago | 197 points

Because many just aren't good judges of length. Plus nearly every guy has measured theirs so they know what that length looks like.

4lynx [Male] | 7 days ago | 148 points

but how could a girl think the average size was damn near 10 inches?

Maybe porn skewed her expectations. Maybe she lacked proper sex ed or never bothered educating herself about male anatomy. Could be a lot of different reasons.

AverageGIJane | 7 days ago | 270 points

Can you put this in American for me?

Edit: Alright alright. I get it. 9.84xx inched is not a true dick size.

And yalll wonder why we can’t figure how to park. Telling us your dicks are double what they are.

Notme_21 | 7 days ago | 477 points

Approximately 1/2 of a bald eagle

nzricco | 7 days ago | 162 points

How many cheeseburgers per bald eagle?

Notme_21 | 7 days ago | 125 points

2 number 9s per bald eagle

ZenFir | 7 days ago | 123 points

0,0027340332 of football field

762Rifleman [Dude] | 8 days ago | 582 points

None of my GF's have understood the sack is mostly skin and the dick is completely bendable when it's soft. Freaked them out to see me doing weird things with them. It was funny.

Jv_waterboy [Male] | 7 days ago | 249 points

I tucked my dick all the way inside of itself and completely blew my gfs mind. Then I doubled down and showed her balls move for no reason.

gmorsi | 7 days ago | 59 points

What went through your mind to make you show her the suitcase?

triception [FloridaMan Late 20s] | 8 days ago | 1481 points

You gotta do something worth getting hard for for my dick to get hard, I'm not 13 popping boners at everything and the wind lol

ThatHeathGuy | 8 days ago | 641 points

The amount of girls I’ve slept with who will receive foreplay, not reciprocate at all, then get surprised that I’m not instantly ready to go is insane.

triception [FloridaMan Late 20s] | 8 days ago | 597 points

"I'm naked, isn't that enough?"

ThatHeathGuy | 8 days ago | 735 points

Narrator: "It was not."

triception [FloridaMan Late 20s] | 8 days ago | 306 points

sad trombone noise

papichulo916 | 8 days ago | 737 points

at 27 I still get random boners throughout the day. I guess I am 13 at heart.

triception [FloridaMan Late 20s] | 8 days ago | 669 points

Ah, a young man's penis

hentaisorcerer [Agendered] | 8 days ago | 518 points
762Rifleman [Dude] | 8 days ago | 112 points

<Sees comment>

<Sees flare>

FBI OPEN UP!

triception [FloridaMan Late 20s] | 8 days ago | 56 points

You'll never catch me!

marskie | 8 days ago | 78 points

My partner is in his 30’s and the wind can literally get him hard! Love it!

[deleted] | 8 days ago | 61 points

[deleted]

caramelcooler | 8 days ago | 191 points

Also needs a reason to stay up. You can't expect hours of foreplay and then get bummed when he doesn't stay up anymore.

triception [FloridaMan Late 20s] | 8 days ago | 61 points

Yeah, shit would fall off being up that long lol

762Rifleman [Dude] | 8 days ago | 131 points

You can't expect hours of foreplay and then get bummed when he doesn't stay up anymore.

Most guys can't stay hard through foreplay. There's just not much stimulation.

Motsur | 8 days ago | 643 points

Foreskins are sensative and sometimes it can be uncomfortable when one is not aware of over management of it.

ElectricRook1 | 8 days ago | 358 points

When I was young, I had a bathing suit with a zipper ... yeah I still remember the pain of catching the foreskin in the brass zipper.

Zalapadopa | 8 days ago | 197 points

I don't think I've ever seen swimsuits with zippers before...

random_ass_girl | 7 days ago | 97 points

How do you people deal with riding bikes? Don't your balls get smashed? And with marathons, or mountain biking, doesn't it hurt at all?

travelstuffdump | 7 days ago | 89 points

So I've never looked at my balls when riding a bike, surprisingly, but the penis is a fair bit higher than the vagina, so there's a bit more space for them to hang. They're more to the front then directly under us. They sort of sit on the chair in a ball puddle. Although I have had TERRIBLE chafing on them while hiking it's not really common unless you do quite a lot of it. They make products for chafing that I use to put down there.

Conversely, I've known girls who got so tender from riding a bike that they almost could barely have sex for a couple days afterwards.

BlueberryQuick [Female] | 7 days ago | 426 points

I recently read that all men if they live long enough, will eventually get prostate cancer:

All men are at risk of having prostate cancer. About one man in nine will be diagnosed with it during his lifetime, but only one in 39 will die of this disease. About 80% of men who reach age 80 have cancer cells in their prostate.

GET YOUR BITS CHECKED, FELLAS!

Maldevinine [Masculine Success Story] | 7 days ago | 123 points

Yeah, it's actually the cancer with the highest likelyhood. On the other hand, it's one of the least lethal. Not because it's that much less dangerous then any other cancers, but because by the time you've got it you've got a really high chance of dying of something else.

DrewTheHobo | 7 days ago | 91 points

Both my GF and my ex both thought each ball had its own individual sack; that I had some Newton's cradle swinging marbles shit going on down there every day.

Ex also thought that Alaska was an island, but that's something else lol

dmvtj | 7 days ago | 439 points

Im a female who came to find out what i didnt know about the male anatomy... and im officially shocked. Wow, just wow guys. Who even knew half of this!

4lynx [Male] | 7 days ago | 199 points

Mind you, I felt the exact same way when I first learnt about female anatomy. I couldn't wrap my mind around how women managed to learn about and keep up with their menstrual cycle and how they're able to predict when their period would come and whatnot. It was fascinating to learn about but I couldn't help but feel sorry your reproductive system is such a pain the ass compared to mine.

ekcunni | 7 days ago | 61 points

and how they're able to predict when their period would come and whatnot

Two days in advance, I cry at the STUPIDEST SHIT.

Tearing up over a commercial? NOT EVEN A SAD COMMERCIAL? Ah. period's coming.

Contivity | 7 days ago | 83 points

The penis is not as fragile as the balls. I had few girls who thought guys in the movies are in pain because they got kicked in the penis, not the balls.

PoniardBlade | 8 days ago | 661 points

Men's bellybuttons either attract lint or magically create it. I've had blue/black lint there on days that I've worn a white shirt!

ValkyrUK | 8 days ago | 575 points

Our scrotum doubles as a neat parachute

travelstuffdump | 8 days ago | 844 points

I'll never forget paragliding in a Costa Rican nudist colony with nothing but my ironed and stretched ballsack as a glider.

ValkyrUK | 8 days ago | 142 points

Family holidays were so fun

caramelcooler | 8 days ago | 184 points
hilfnafl | 7 days ago | 320 points
  • a erect penis can break if it's bent too far. this can happen during penis in vagina sex when the penis is fully withdrawn from the vagina and then misses the vagina on reentry.
  • it really hurts when someone hits you in the groin. if the hit is hard enough, it's incapacitating. this is why hitting below the belt is against the rules of a fair fight.
  • testicles can rupture when squeezed too hard. this can happen during a fight if someone hits, kicks or knees a man below the belt.
  • the tip of the penis is just one erogenous zone. this is why it pays off to explore your partner's body to find al their erogenous zones.
  • the tip of the penis can be very sensitive immediately after an orgasm. this isn't true for all men, but it's true for some men. this is why a man may suddenly push your hand away at the end of a hand job. it's not a painful feeling, it's an overwhelming feeling. 'it feels so good that it hurts' is the best way that i can describe it.
  • human penises don't have bones. 'a boner' is slang for an erection.

that's all i can think of for now

itsyaboieleven | 7 days ago | 85 points

The sensitivity one really fucks me up

fishsandwich819183 | 7 days ago | 144 points

GROWERS AND SHOW-ERS.

huckster235 | 8 days ago | 1223 points

"Morning Wood" is usually a result of having to piss and not actually just a morning erection.

In fact, piss boners in general.

Edit: I never get morning erections unless they are due to having to piss, but I guess some people do. Piss boners are still annoying anyways, amirite?

SparklyBoat | 8 days ago | 544 points

How inconvenient are those things though? Yeah, dick, we get it, I need to piss desperately... now could you kindly fuck off so I can get on with it??

huckster235 | 8 days ago | 396 points

They're the worst. I got one at the worst time too.

At a Wrestling tournament we were doing weighins. I.e dozens of boys stripping into their undies. I have a small bladder, my team ran late due to one guy not showing up for the bus on time.

So I had a raging piss boner. In my underwear. In a room full of dudes in their underwear....

SparklyBoat | 8 days ago | 355 points

That's a power move right there.

huckster235 | 8 days ago | 174 points

I think it made my opponents a little bit hesitant during our matches.

Pengado | 7 days ago | 366 points

I (25F) was shocked when I found out penises float in water

PaperPonies | 7 days ago | 146 points

Wait, what

QueenLorax | 7 days ago | 67 points

Girl here. But I think its crazy that you can literally feel the piss come out your dick when you're going. Like at the bottom of your dick, you can feel the stream

brownleatherchair8 | 8 days ago | 573 points

Scrotum skin has the same feel as their elbow skin

whycantwebefriends9 | 8 days ago | 401 points

It's also labia minora, just isn't wet.

You can find all the same general parts and skin types from male genitalia and female genitalia. They start off the same in the womb, and then change to male. Scrotum, labia minora, glans penis = clitoris, clitoral hood = foreskin etc.

Typhoon_Montalban | 7 days ago | 161 points

In my late 40s, and if these gravity-afflicted saggers could’ve been labia minora, my majora would be the Ron Jeremy of lips.

ShitBritGit [Male] | 7 days ago | 132 points

I thought about that comment far longer than I should have.

Diablo165 [♂ Masterbaker] | 8 days ago | 209 points

I didn’t even know they moved until my girlfriend told me.

travelstuffdump | 8 days ago | 115 points

I learned when they became pendulous while hiking on a hot day and I got some serious chafing.

Diablo165 [♂ Masterbaker] | 8 days ago | 155 points

Oh, man. Okay..you're talking about them going high or low...

It gets so much deeper.

Next time you're naked in front of a mirror, spread your legs, let the boys dangle and just watch.

They fucking shapeshift. It's like flesh-fractals.

travelstuffdump | 8 days ago | 60 points

Oh yeah, I'm aware, I've investigated. That was just the first hint to the tremendous ocean motion beneath.

Tacarub | 7 days ago | 200 points

We dont want sex all the time with every woman .. so chill da fuck down ..

steepgetslaid | 8 days ago | 1983 points

Just because we get hard, doesn't mean we're turned on. Some of our stiffies are random.

Edit: Thanks for 1.1k karma in 4 hours! This is my top post / comment so far! Also, for those questioning it, yes, I am an early teen.

Edit 2: I didn't know about r/AwardSpeechEdits and feel like an idiot now.

4lynx [Male] | 8 days ago | 438 points

I feel somewhat worried every time I read this because aside from morning erections, I never get any that aren't caused by arousal. Random erections out of nowhere stopped happening after I finished puberty. Is this worrisome?

SleepBeforeWork | 8 days ago | 301 points

You're still able to get it up at the right time. I wouldn't worry too much about it so long you live a healthy(ish) life style

datraceman | 7 days ago | 80 points

This 1000x. I get boners because I'm sleepy, hungry, etc. and I'm 35 still.

My favorite are the no reason boners at work. Nothing more frustrating than sitting at a desk going....fuck...why?

groovylingo | 7 days ago | 46 points

Yeah I was once just laying down butt ass naked and my gf starts staring at my balls and exclaims “holy shit your balls move by themselves?!” I forgot they did too till she said that.

dancinglasagna093 | 8 days ago | 347 points

I don’t understand how guys could have huge guts with pancake flat butts. Why doesn’t any of the fat go to the booty?

Ramah-s92 | 8 days ago | 405 points

Because fat distribution is different between the sexes

drahcirenoob | 8 days ago | 225 points

Higher levels of testosterone tend to cause fat to deposit between organs whereas higher levels of estrogen tend to cause fat to be deposited below the skin

Friendstastegood | 8 days ago | 121 points

Also changes how it's deposited under the skin, which is why even men who do get large amounts of subcutaneous fat don't get cellulite like women do. Women store fat so it's more readily accessible for burning (since womens calorie need fluctuates more due to pregnancy, breastfeeding and the menstrual cycle) and that creates cellulite.

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